Sunday, August 15, 2010

What I DON'T believe in

"They" said.....
trust in God
Everything happens for a reason
God never gives you more then you can handle

What kind of fucking advice is THAT?!?!?

I told my family I was gay and they disowned me when I was 21
I lost a baby in 2005
My wife had a meat scale fall on her head and have VERY painful surgery
I lost my job for something I didn't even do
I watched my mother-in-law slowly die
and now my wife (my world) has been diagnosed with cancer
I've struggled all my life

Trust in God you say? Why on earth would I trust in someone who is all powerful and yet never lifted a finger to help me? Would you trust in a human being who watched you suffer and had the ability to help and didn't?

Everything happens for a reason. Are you kidding me? That's just to stupid to bother commenting on.

Believe? Pray? i did more then that! There have been times when I curled up on the floor sobbing and BEGGED! He did NOTHING!

God never gives you more then you can handle. Really? That makes sense to someone? Does that make sense to anyone? By that logic, it would be O.K. to torcher anyone constantly because it wasn't more then they "could handle". That's not just crazy, it's sick!

How does one prevent becoming bitter when I see assholes, who are evil and selfish and care for no one but themselves get thrive.....get all they want out of life.....with no consequences for the horrible things they did to get there.....not a one.

So this God I'm supposed to believe in and "trust in"... able to help but doesn't
...only torcher me enough to not kill me physically
...but I should accept it because he has a "reason" for doing it

Either this god you all love is indifferent (the OPPOSITE OF LOVE), or a sadistic bastard. Either way why would I love and worship, or trust and believe in him?

If a human being did these things would you worship THEM?

All I've learned is that.....If you knock someone on their ass enough times, eventually they will stop trying to get up! 

.....and yet here I am....fighting for what I love AGAIN! Always fighting.....loosing a little of myself each time.

Apparently this God of yours hasn't finished teaching me the lesson yet.....hasn't taught me to stop getting up every time he mercilessly throws me to the ground.



  1. Couldn't have said that shit better myself!

    Talk about a cushy gig!

    If shit is good "God has blessed you"... if shit is bad "God works in mysterious ways" if He doesn't do shit for you "God helps those that help themselves."

    WTF ever -- they've set that shit up so that there is NO way to disprove that motherfucker's existence (you know, aside from common fucking sense).

    Bunch of bullshit right there.

    Fuck him.

    There's only us... only this. (To quote from the only Bible I believe in - the Rent script LOL)

    Love you! Hugs! Big time...

  2. If Tina didn't share this, I wouldn't have known about this blog. You're now in my reader and I will be following each an every update with such compassion. I am truly sorry you're going through this and I'll be thinking of you and Tina and wishing you strength and courage.

    I'm a proud atheist and never believed there was anyone to say fuck you to. But if it helps at all, FUCK YOU!!!!